As of yesterday, I’m officially 20 weeks with this pregnancy! It’s hard to believe that I’m already halfway there and at the same time it feels like we still have a loooong way to go before this little one’s arrival. Last week we got the very exciting news that we’re going to be having another little girl. Sisters!! I was thoroughly shocked because I’ve felt so different this pregnancy and was convinced it was a boy. I asked the technician to check again just to be sure, ha!
HOW I’M FEELING
Overall I’d say I’m feeling much better these days. The first trimester was so rough this time around, with lots of nausea, but thankfully it started to taper off around 15 weeks and I rarely feel it anymore. Although it has been replaced by heartburn, which I started experiencing much sooner this time around than I did with Lucy. I try to limit spicy foods and chocolate when I can, and I always carry Tums around now.
Before we left on our road trip last week, we had a chance to see the baby on an ultrasound again and I find that every time we see her it puts me a little more at ease. It felt like for the longest time I was holding my breath with this pregnancy and it’s been really great to relax a little now.
Aside from waking me up kicking every morning around 6:30 am (just like Lucy did), I’ve been able to sleep through the night soundly. It all starts with a carefully arranged system of pillows – one behind my back, a king size pillow along my front and a fluffy one at my head. Garrett went to bed before me last night and when I crawled in I found that he’d arranged everything for me. I could have teared up right then and there. #pregnancyhormones
I first started to feel the little “butterfly” flutters that people talk about around 15 weeks, much sooner than I felt it for Lucy, but I’ve heard that can happen with subsequent pregnancies. Now I feel full body rolls all the time, especially in the evenings or if I’ve eaten something sweet. As I mentioned above, she loves to wake me up with her somersaults around 6:30am every morning, which I’m not upset about at all. It’s a nice way to wake up every morning, laying in bed before Lucy is up and thinking of how much this new little one is growing.
In the first trimester, I could not stand anything sweet, especially chocolate. I completely avoided candy at Easter (even those addictive mini eggs!) and could barely eat so much as a spoonful of ice cream without feeling nauseous. Thankfully all that has gone away and I can eat most things like normal. I’m definintely craving vegetables over meat these days, and fruit that isn’t very sweet.
When I was super nauseous in the first trimester I couldn’t find anything to stop it until I read that someone tried salt and vinegar chips. As soon as I read that I was convinced I needed them. I asked Garrett to either a) go right away to the store to get some or b) watch Lucy so I could go. It was an immediate crisis, ha! It only will take 3-5 chips but the salt and vinegar taste seems to cut out my nausea instantly. Which means we’ve had salt and vinegar chips on our grocery shopping list every week.
One very weird craving is for something I don’t even have normally. I never drink coffee and yet I can’t stop thinking about mocha (coffee-chocolate) flavoured things. So much so that I mentioned it to Garrett and he passed along the word to my mom & sister, who surprised me with a mocha flavoured birthday cake. They almost didn’t believe him when he told them because it is so out of character for me, but they made it anyways – and it was even BETTER than I could have imagined.
Everyone always asks us how Lucy is doing with the idea of being a big sister and honestly I don’t think she is really all that aware of what is going on (or she is just ignoring it). We’ve taken her to the ultrasounds with us and the last time she told us the baby was hungry. Sometimes she talks about the baby in my belly and gives it kisses, but most times she can’t be bothered if anyone brings it up. Overall our approach has been to not push the subject. If she brings it up we talk about it or if she points at my growing belly, but we’re going to let her lead us on this one. We still have plenty of time to talk to her about it before the baby gets here.
FEELING NERVOUS ABOUT
I feel like there are three things that really keep me up at night with this pregnancy. The first is thinking about how Lucy will feel to go from an only child where she gets my full attention, to suddenly sharing me with another baby. She’s never shown jealousy with other kids before, but it could be very different when this baby is in her own house. Any mamas out there with suggestions, please leave them below! 🙂
Secondly, I do worry about how to give this new baby the same level of care and devotion that I was able to give to Lucy when she was born. My entire world revolved around Lucy while I navigated this whole new life of motherhood, but this time I’ll be juggling two kids. I know moms do this all the time, but it’s still something that I fret about.
Lastly, I do worry quite a bit about what will happen at delivery. The ending of Lucy’s birth was quite traumatic and stressful for me (you can read about it in her birth story), and I can’t help but worry about going through something like that again. Before I was in labour, so many women complained about the pain of delivery, and despite a serious tear and some horrible back labour that even an epidural couldn’t take away, the pain wasn’t as bad as I was expecting. The overwhelming joy you feel once you’re with your baby overcomes all that (even if it’s hours later that you get to see them, as in my case), and I remember telling Garrett that I’d go through it all again the very next day to have Lucy with us. But the trauma of her arrival and the five minutes of complete terror when I thought we’d lost her, is what I worry about experiencing again.
I was with a great team of midwives last time and I highly recommend going that route (especially for first-time moms with lots of questions), but given my experience last time and the miscarriages we had leading up to this pregnancy, I’m going with an OB for this birth. Coincidentally he is the same doctor who ended up delivering Lucy two years ago and my brother over twenty years ago! Knowing we’re in really good hands is definitely helping put me at ease.
I feel a little guilty to admit that we’ve gotten nothing for the new baby yet. This time around I realize how many things you really don’t need, or use very much. Even though we’re having another girl, I still plan to buy some new things for this baby, especially considering she’ll be arriving in late October and almost everything I have for newborns is for summertime.
Same goes for my maternity clothes – everything I have is for winter months and we’re heading into a HOT summer. I’ve stocked up on a few t-shirts, shorts and summer dresses, but I’m trying to limit what I buy and keep more of a minimalist wardrobe this summer.
As for our plan on sleeping arrangements, the baby with be sharing a room with us for those first few months, but eventually she’ll move to the nursery, which I’ll be keeping relatively the same with just a few new changes. Sometime this summer we’ll be turning our guest room into Lucy’s big girl room, and giving her plenty of time to adjust to it before the baby gets here, so she doesn’t feel she’s been kicked out. We debated quite a bit about whether to keep her in the same room or make the new room for the baby. A big deciding factor was that we know you can’t hear a baby cry as much from the guest room and we’re hoping that will keep Lucy from being too disturbed from the baby at night. I’m also planning to have a small bed for myself in the nursery so that I can sleep in there as needed, and give everyone else in the house a good night’s sleep even if the baby and I are up.
Thanks for following along on this journey! xoxo